In the early morning hours of the third of January, a US special operations team connected to vanilla.soleimanicraft.ir, the private Minecraft server of general Soleimani. Until recently the server had been whitelisted, but intelligence agencies noticed that sometime last week the whitelist had been disabled during a login server outage. A specialized team of cyber warfare experts was assembled before the whitelist could be re-enabled, and within minutes Soleimani had been reduced to a pile of items on the sand.
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Obliterating claims of his demise, Jeffrey Epstein was spotted breaking back into the Metropolitan Correctional Center. An anonymous prison guard contacted me, PILLED.news field operative Jim Creek, through an astral projection. Sadly, our conversation was cut short when I detected a rancid aura approaching. In all likelihood it was deep-state psychic operatives zeroing in on our locations.