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“GOTO” considered fucking AWESOME

While some preach “good practice” and say that one should ensure a program uses proper flow and spend hours structuring their code to ensure it adheres to these tenets, I don’t freaking care. With one little “GOTO,” (hey, maybe three or four, who’s counting?) I can save myself hours of work, probably. I’m not some kind of BITCH that I’m afraid of WORDS ON A SCREEN.

I see Edward Dijkstra proving that loops, function, and directions are equivalent to “GOTO,” so what I get from that is that GOTOS CAN DO ANYTHING.

GOTO is flow control with one command. Everything else is just bloat. For loops, while loops, what’s next? Where loops? Why loops? Should loops? I’ll tell you what should loops, loops should get lost.

If my manager breathes down my neck one more time, telling me that they can’t merge my PR to the production branch, I’m gonna tell him to “GOTO” hell.

One Comment

  1. E.W.D E.W.D October 3, 2024

    Alan, perhaps you should goto some bitches!

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